METROSEXUAL'S ATTACK!!!!! You're just gay and in denial, and that's NOT the river in Egypt...

Today, I was confronted by the heathens that I work with about a paper that one has to write. It's for a class called Men and Masculinity. Where was that class when I was stuck in Women's Studies with all these other heathens talking about how I'm so lucky I can't get raped, and pregnant, and blah blah blah... I would have loved to hear about all the great stuff men do, and actually probably would have payed attention better in that class. But instead, like I said, I was the scum of the earth in the back of the classroom, but oh well, that's done and over. Back to the point here, she has to write a paper, and her topic that she chose is "questioning the masculinity of metrosexuals." Good call, but where do you research something that plainly doesn't exist? Metrosexuals are gays in denial. They just haven't found the right guy yet, or they're not fully out of the closet, etc... First, let's examine what "metrosexuality" is.


Main Entry: metrosexual
Part of Speech: n, adj
Definition: a heterosexual male who has a strong aesthetic sense and inordinate interest in appearance and style, similar to that of homosexual males
Etymology: 1994; blend of metropolitan + heterosexual
Usage: informal


Now that we have accomplished, let's examine further... Look at the definition, it says "heterosexual male" with a "sense in appearance and style..." That right there is a fluke in itself... There's no such thing as a male with style, because a male that does have "style" has that because HIS GIRLFRIEND bought him that stuff! But the end however, where it says "similar to that of homosexual males." Exactly, right there at this point, it shows you the obvious point that metrosexuals and homosexuals are in direct relation of one another. Homosexuals, no doubt, have "a sense of fashion." We've all seen it before, and if you haven't, you might want to get checked out for a serious case of "OH NO, I'M GAY MYSELF!" Therefore, the point I'm trying to push here is that metrosexuals are really just homosexuals in true denial of their feelings...


Ask any real man, any man that doesn't have a sense of style if there's a difference between metrosexuals and homosexuals, and there is, without a doubt, no difference, it's just a euphamism if you must. (euphamism - a word that is more pleasantly put than that of using a more inappropriate word. Example: "I have to take a crap" instead you would say "I have to use the restroom"). Just the use of the word metrosexual just upsets me, because it's just not a true statement. There's no such thing. There's nothing masculine about a guy that has a sense of fashion that slightly resembles a homosexual, because that's like saying a homosexual is still a man... NO HE'S NOT!!! He might be the man in the relationship, but one of the two is the bitch, but he is not considered "still a man," because that's just man law.

Point of today's lesson is that Metrosexuals are just homosexuals in denial. They can be in denial for many reasons, and reasons that of which, I honestly don't care, at all... But regardless, metrosexuals are not masculine, and are not straight. Point in turn, they're gay...

65,504 people just realized that they're gay after reading this and checking their current fashion sense after reading this...