There is no better team in the NFL than the Bengals... At losing... They're so good at losing in fact, that I think 0 - 16 is not only possible, but maybe a statement of fact! This picture of Marvin is from his first year joining the Bengals as head coach. Notice a difference in this picture compared to maybe one from his "apology to the fans" speeches? This could also be a picture from this year, just botoxed up so he doesn't show that face he always has on the sidelines... It's amazing that a guy that is 0 - 16 (yes, I know know it's only 0 - 8 right now, but again, this is so I don't have to write another one in December) and has only had one winning season in God knows how many years still has a job! If I did my job as crappy as these coaches and players did, I wouldn't even get a second chance to even explain myself, I'd be gone, and back in the unemployment line. When you get this bad at losing, your hopes for even a high school coaching job or peewee league are shot. However, before I take anymore cheap shots at Marvin, let me further explain.
I cannot put all of the blame on this poor guy that took a salary blow to head coach a prison league professional (although highly unprofessional) football team. It took a lot of guts to step up to a plate that is too big for even a guy like Bill Cowher to step up to... But really, I want to blame on Mr. Brown. Mike Brown is without a doubt, the worse owner of any sports team, and I'm pretty sure he's never owned a successful career in anything other than hiding from the public. Since Marvin has been here, I haven't seen the guy once in a press release, or anything. Of course, if I was this bad of an owner, you're right, I wouldn't show my face either, but come on. Quit making Marvin apologize, I want to hear it from you asshole! At this point in my Bengals career, I wouldn't even accept free Box tickets or front row 50 yard line seats! I'm so fed up with the lack of drive, lack of emotion, and lack of skill that these "players" have on and off the field... Mr. Brown needs to come out and explain this "method of madness" he has for the Bengals... I mean, did he talk to them and tell them to do the worst they could possibly do? That would explain a lot for me, and I'd probably be less frustrated!
First Fallacy: Bengals offseason - The offseason was filled with trials and tribulations all over the place. Whether it was Marvin saying that in no way, shape or form is Chris Henry coming back to Chad Johnson saying he's not going to play wah wah wah! The fact that Mike Brown went around Marvin Lewis' decision to not bring Henry back is a total lack of respect for your coach, and that will make the players question their coach, and not want to play all out for him. As for Chris Henry, just go, you deserve to be in Prison, but I guess you're a cat with 100 lives, because you've already used up more than 9... Chad Johnson, who should be a leader to rally up the troops to make them want to play, is bi-polar on and off the field. One minute he laughs when Houston says their going to cover him man to man, and how many receptions for how many yards did he have? Who's laughing now Chad? 30 what to 6? Exactly! Chad should not be allowed to say anything until he breaks over 150 yards in a game, otherwise they should fine him.
Second Fallacy: Bengals Offense - So lets see, instead of wanting to keep our veterans on the line, and have a strong chance of leadership on the line, we'd rather get rid of them, shift people over to positions they've never played, and then, expect them to perform! Good Plan! Somehow, TJ has made himself the second best receiver in the league, so that either means that every other receiver in the NFL is that bad, or I just don't watch TJ as closely as I should. Like I said before, Chris Henry is as worthless as can be, dropping every pass that comes his way! Carson, can't hate him, actually, I only feel bad for him that he can't display his talent for a good team! Chad, just read above. Chad went from being my favorite receiver to being a no ball pussy loser faster than the beginning of Flight of Fear at Kings Island! No cuts inside, no amazing catches that take the team up the field, and just no heart left in him! Hell, I think there's some players at Lakota East and West that we could draft that would be better! Props to Carson and Housh for sticking it out out on the field. Chris Perry, keep him benched, he's worthless too! He fumbles almost every ball he touches with his 1.7 yard run. Cedric Benson, I have to give you props, for just getting here, and getting more yards than Perry EVERY CARRY and holding on to the ball, you get my game ball every time! Offensive Line, lets just work on not collapsing when we call hike. Give Fitzpatrick a chance for some pocket time! And Fitzpatrick, well, not much to say here, he didn't really know he'd be shoved into this position so early, but guess what bro, time to play! Suck it up, hold on to the ball and take the hit, or scramble and make plays! I do have to say that more and more, he is doing much better, for a second string quarterback...
Third Fallacy: Bengals Defense - Tough to call, they got rid of the heart of the line, only to move people around that have to learn all new moves! The Bengals defense is great, the only problem is they play more than 3/4's of the game because our offense blows that much! The Defense looks crappy because our offense is wearing them down... I have to give props to the Defense for doing what they can, we know it's tough for you, and I still respect you...
Little did I know after hearing Marvin's comments yesterday, I'm starting to think he's right, but a little confused... Let's take a look:
"We don't have many options," he said. "We have to find a way to get these players better."
-Yea, it's called offseason, pre-season, etc... How much time do you need? Every other team doesn't seem to have a problem "getting their players better..."
"We all have to find a way collectively to flip our psyche."
-Flip our psyche? What the crap does that mean? I think I have the answer for that... GROW A PAIR AND STAND UP TO YOUR OWNER! Let him know that on that field and during the draft, YOU RUN THE SHOW! At least if he says, ok, you're fired! The Bengals fans will at least see that you care and will respect you! He can't fire you! We're mid-season, an 0 - 8 season at that! Stand up to him, and make sure he knows who's the boss on the field!
"We have a couple of areas that we need some work in..."
-If by a couple areas you mean Offense, Defense, and Special Teams, then yes, we do have a couple of areas to work on... However, in each of those folders, there are 1000's of sub-folders, and those all need work, so therefore your "some work" becomes "a lot" of work... Some work is a phrase that maybe a team like, the Titans, could use, you know, after their game with Indy... Yes, their offense could use "some work" but not as much as the Bengals need... Actually, come to think of it, then Bengals don't need work, they need a restructuring, or a restart, that's how terrible we are...
Conclusion: Give up on them, don't attend the games, let Mike Brown suffer financially, and then let him take this team elsewhere... I heard somewhere that they would possibly sell PBS to a soccer team that would play internationally! Soccer games are awesome in professional sports, and I'm pretty sure that'd be pretty cool! I'm tired of the Bengals anyways, always drafting "project players..." They don't even need to draft project players, our stadium is surrounded by projects, just give them 500 bucks a game, and someone to pass their drug tests and we're set... Those guys can catch a 250 pound television thrown by their buddy from a third story window... Trust me, a football would be no problem... Bengals, just go away, don't make this more difficult than it has to be... We'll See Ya
851,265 people just realized that the projects joke was a play on words...
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