As per a conversation today with a fellow unnamed coworker, she (yes a woman of course) was trying to covertly get me to watch "the notebook" (yes I realize movie titles are supposed to be capitalized, but trust me, it's not a real movie). During the conversation, she decided to go against my cardinal rule and compare said movie to that of "The Boondock Saints." Now, let's take in for instance, that I said and I quote "I will never see 'the notebook'" This is something that I stand true to and yes, something that will in fact, never happen. After stating that said fact again, she then brought up that I would like 'the notebook' because "It really is a good movie! Almost as good as Boondock Saints…" That right there is a fallacy... (Fallacy (n) - a deceptive, misleading, or false notion, belief, etc. Such as people once believing that the world is flat was a fallacy). To even compare a real movie like The Boondock Saints to a non-movie such as "the notebook" is just vacuous. (Vacuous (v) - inanely foolish).
Here's why these movies are in no way, shape, or form comparable.
the notebook premise - "The movie focuses on an old man reading a story to an old woman in a nursing home. The story he reads follows two young lovers named Allie Hamilton and Noah Calhoun, who meet one evening at a carnival. But they are separated by Allie's parents who disapprove of Noah's unwealthy family, and move Allie away. (ZZZZZzzzz, sorry I fell asleep just reading this). After waiting for Noah to write her for several years, Allie meets and gets engaged to a handsome young soldier named Lon. Allie, then, with her love for Noah still alive, stops by Noah's 200-year-old home that he restored for her, "to see if he's okay". It is evident that they still have feelings for each other, and Allie has to choose between her fiancee and her first love." (according to imdb.com).
Not bad for a movie premise I guess, now I can say that I've seen it before... Basically, here's my interpretation, it's the "Titanic" without a boat... How much more of a chick flick can this be?? Love stories, love triangles, horrible actors, and a stupid background story... SHIT'S WEAK!!! Now lets take a look at the premise of "The Boondock Saints!"
"The Boondock Saints" premise - Irish brothers Connor & Murphy McManus live and work in Boston. Feeling that God's will to rid Earth from all human Evil was given to them as a mission, they set out to do their divine deed. A public outcry is never heard, and even FBI agent Paul Smecker, who follows their trace of bloodshed, admits that the boys are doing exactly what he secretly always has wished to happen. Risking their lives for their beliefs of Veritas (truth) and Aequitas (justice), the Boondock Saints are hyped by the public, for they are doing good, which only few dare to admit. (according to imdb.com)
What? Are you serious?!? Can you even read that paragraph without sporting more wood than a weekend hunting show?!? Let's take a look at why these reviews alone can tell you that they are nothing alike...
"the notebook" - key words to point out gayness: old man, reading, nursing home, young loves, carnival, engaged, old home, love x 100... BORING!!! I literally, LITERALLY fell asleep just reading the stupid 2 second review... It was also funny to see that the only people that commented on it were WOMEN! Trust me, this just sounds like a boring love movie that I couldn't be paid to watch... (sorry Rick, you're right on most things, but this movie is still never going to be viewed by me)...
"The Boondock Saints" - key words to point out it's innate manliness: Irish, Boston, rid Earth, evil, divine deed, bloodshed, risking their lives, etc... I mean, this movie is the very birthplace of badassness... You can't even begin to compare even Rambo (or all 16 of them together) to the very manliness of this movie!
Sappiness take a seat, because "The Boondock Saints" is the clean and clear winner of this movie review, and I didn't even have to waste my time to watch "the notebook" just to know that the review must suck as bad as the movie probably does... Anytime you got Ryan "goose face" Gosling in the movie, it's going to be horrible... Why do you think he's never in any good movies involving guns, or bloodshed? Because he's really a "she!" I bet "she" even wears "vajayjay top" sweaters like this!
Is that your head popping out of your vajayjay or is that a new type of sweater? I can't tell...
Lastly, just look at the movie labels... If you look at "the notebook" you get a crappy picture of 2 girls making out and a boat on a lake... Woopty Doo! Can't wait to see this insomniac medicine of a movie... But when you step back and look at "The Boondock Saints" cover, BAM!!! Guns, insinuating violence, and 2 pissed off Irish brothers with badass tattoo's... You can't get that type of entertainment anymore, anywhere! That's probably because "The Boondock Saints" was SO BADASS that no one would even attempt to make a more manly movie like it! That's all I got for all you tree hugging, love story stricken women out there, here's a hint, GET A BOYFRIEND!!! Hell, I'll take it one stop forward and tell you where to meet a good manly man, IN MOVIES LIKE "THE BOONDOCK SAINTS!!!" We'll see ya!
8,543,111 people just realized that they're going to come to my blog to decide which movies are worth being seen and which ones aren't because I'm that awesome now that they've read this blog...
2 comments:
Wow. That girl needs to be fired for incompetence immediately. She might be very competent at the job she does, but fire her none the less for that comparison.
Comparing those two movies is like comparing apples to elephants, or like Scarlett Johansen to Chunk from "The Goonies." In no way, shape or form are the movies anything alike, except that they are movies.
Please Hoopes, punch her in the face for movie goers everywhere.
Chill, boys! I simply stated that they are both GREAT movies (which they are) Obviously, very different movies, but BOTH great...
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